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AlterniaBound versus The Doctors
AlterniaBound versus The Doctors is the fourteenth battle of the second season of Uber Rap Battles of Fiction, therefore being the twenty-ninth battle overall. Battle Information Noremac as 1st Doctor Mat4yo as 2nd Doctor ZombieLicker as 3rd and 10th Doctor AccordionChick as 4th Doctor and Kanaya EDX as 5th Doctor Pool as 6th Doctor and Eridan Canadion as 7th Doctor, Equius, and Karkat Stofferex as 8th Doctor MaNCHA as 9th Doctor and Gamzee Joey Hawkins as 11th Doctor HarryPotter2875 as 12th Doctor PinkiesCupcake as Feferi and Vriska HachidoriNinja as Terezi and Nepeta Lususless as Aradia B-Lo Lorbes as Tavros WoodenHornets as Sollux Beats by Allrounda, LionANDPrime, GamBeat808, SadikBeats, JJBeatsOfficial, and RapBeatzMaker Released on April 17, 2014 Lyrics 1st Doctor: I am the Doctor, the original I might say to you gray bugs The Daleks are great compared to the scourge of you punks! The blood of Gallifrey in my veins, with neither tears or anxieties I’ll be back to take down every last one of you, no matter the varieties 2nd Doctor: Oh my giddy aunt! To think you're skilled, what a joke! How enraging to start a war ‘tween geniuses and blokes You’re a dysfunctional bunch of homicidal “friends” or, actually Twelve horny aliens who will wrought lyrical catastrophe ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Feferi: W)(at's t)(is I )(ear from two cosmic )(obo peasants? Messing wit)( royalty? Reelly? W)(ale isn't t)(at pleasant! You've got literally no c)(ance, You're facing uneart)(ly opponents! -Eridan, tell t)(em )(ow t)(ey'll be left r)(eumatistic and broken! Eridan: Don’t start a wwar wwith us you fuckin time lords Unless you wwant Ahab’s Crosshairs in your sides port or starboard WWhale wwhat do you knoww I sea none of your fucking regrets Its nonsense for you to think that you can correctly agress ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 3rd Doctor: Now listen to me, and put up your dukes because I’m ready to go Just let me step right up & reverse the polarity with my neutron flow I’m more condescending than the Imperial Queen Spitting raps so sick you’ll turn sea green You’re royalty? Please! You know what I’ve seen? Killing the lime-bloods and Lusi is awful and mean! 4th Doctor: Would you care for a Jelly Baby ‘cause that’s not all I’m dishing I leave you both without life or hope, which sure won’t be fishy I’ve got the bark and the bite so you can call me K-9 You’ll now be culled like with Gl'bgolyb as I best you with rhyme ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Terezi: W3LL, WH4T DO H4V3 W3 H3R3? YOU S33, 1 C4NT S33 YOU OH, 4 R4D14T3D D4NDY 4ND 4 SORT OF SC4RF13D QU33R, OOH! SO WH1L3 FOUR 1S HUNG W1TH H1S SC4RF YOU C4N GO SCREW OFF TO S4R4H TH3N 1 C4N D3L1V3R YOU JUST1C3, NOW T4K3 TH3 M1C, VR1SK4! Vriska: Alright, sister, let's show these scourges that they're worthless. We'll clim8 the pyramids of Mars just to m8ke sure that they're mirthless. Let me roll us a quick scenario as their disencour8gement is hastening. Six, seven, 8ight, 8rilliant!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ANCESTRAL AW8KENING!!!!!!!! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 5th Doctor: Lick and sniff this, because you won’t see me attacking I’ll take my Cricket bat and give you both a good 8 whackings I’m getting rid of your “vision eightfold” so you call me Doc Scratch I’d love to diss you with more raps but sorry, gotta dash! 6th Doctor: Don’t even need my sonic to screw you over with rhymes I’ve been enlightened, I’m wiser, I’ve got the better mind It’s the Trial of the Time Lord to debunk your blind justice Burning you like Prince Kylo and you’re not even a witch ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Kanaya: Really You Two You Must Think That Youre So Superior Call Me Praxis Gases Because Im Making You Inferior Dont Make Me Pull Out My Lipstick And Create A Red Flood Or Else Ill Be Enjoying The Taste Of Your Candy Red Blood Aradia: The ap0calypse is arising f0r y0u cann0t defeat the dead J0seph better watch his c0l0red c0at 0r Ill be crushing his head Anew I have c0me t0 exterminate this time, you get it Thats en0ugh talking f0r me s0 just piss 0ff ribbit ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 7th Doctor: Breeding frogs? That’s the most useless skill in all of time and space! I’ve destroyed Daleks with the use of my mind, friends, companions, and grace The only thing that’s “up to the spirits” is how this maid’ll be whipped I’ve got several questions for this rainbow drinker and archaeologist 8th Doctor: Light yourself up to help us see a loser and a ghostly bore You know this Doc isn’t afraid to fight, ever hear of the Time War? Arisen anew? What a copy! You were admiring us! Prepare to get finished worse than Aradia killing Sollux! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Nepeta: :33 < This is purrfect, Equius, may I have purrmission to fight? :33 < Why not name you two the Whore Doctors while you spoon in the night :33 < You started off a happy clown but then you got evil as hell :33 < This is your night fur destruction as we ring the death knell Equius: D --> Want a warrior, Doctor? Prepare to be crushed by my fists D --> You were shot by the Chinese and you pretended to be Si% D --> The best player by far, I’m quite the lyrical Ace! D --> So here's a question for you: why don't you go back to space ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 9th Doctor: Well we’ve got the ultimate fangirl on our hands, and her guardian? I’m writing lines more elegant than in the era of the Victorians Stop it with the musclebeasts before I melt you like plastic Gamzee went on a rampage? Well this is fantastic! 10th Doctor: Allons-y! You morails are quite a disgrace! Asphyxiated, Zahhak? Do you need some breathing space? Nothing can help you fill the growing void in your hearts! I don’t want to quit rapping, please! Don’t let me depart! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Tavros: uHH, oKAY i GUESS IT’S TIME TO START SOME SICKNASTY FIRES, iF EITHER OF YOU THINKS THAT YOU ARE VIRTUOUS, yOU’RE LIARS, sTOP YOUR SNIVELLING, TEN, wE KNOW dONNA’S THE REAL MAN FIDUSPAWN, gO, bECAUSE DEFEATING YOU IS THE GAME PLAN Sollux: Are you my mummy? No, youre an iin2ufferable a22! II 2ure a2 hell wont be bliinkiing when II launch an OPTIIC BLA2T. Knock knock knock knock, Ten’2 tiime ha2 come, oh he know2... Oh, what wiill leave you iin tear2? A ro2e! A ro2e!. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 11th Doctor: I’m feeling a crippling doom while listening to your lines so Silence, please, I really don’t wish to hear you whine! I’ll doubly reach around to cut off your legs on my own Geronimo, and adios! You’re going to be overthrown! 12th Doctor: Take a breath, eleven, for there’s no more reason for you to brawl I’m the renegade rebel ready to fucking bring you Alternia’s fall! I hope you’re prepared for the best because a new era has begun And now the TARDIS and I shall be back, since I’m sure that we’ve won! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Karkat: OH MY THROBBING PHLEGM LOBE, WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THIS YOU TWO SHITSPONGES ARE INSANE! I'M TIRED OF THIS NONSENSE I'M RANTING OUT A FRUITY RUMPUS BUT I WONT WAIT TWELVE YEARS TO DO IT THE TIME OF THE DOCTOR HAS COME AND *SIGH* YOU KNOW WHAT? SCREW IT! Gamzee: HoLd On ThErE, mOtHeRfUcKeR, tHeRe’s No NeEd To Be CrAzY. iT’S jUsT a FeZ-oBsEsSeD cReEp AnD a RaGiNg MaN wHo LoVeS kIdNeYs. FoR tHeM tO rEcOvEr FrOm ThIs JuGgAlO wOuLd Be A mOtHeRfUcKiN mIrAcLe. hOnK hOnK, mOtHeRfUcKeRs, WeLcOmE tO tHe DaRk CaRnIvAl... Trivia TBA Category:Season 2 Category:Storm Five